Update 7/9/2020. Over a year. I have said this numerous times and I express that with as much frustration now as when it kept going and going and going.
On this point, I’m sure Sarah is out there somewhere tittering about all of it. New handle is @eatmyassbitxh, by the way.
For over a year, Sarah has pushed a lie without basis against numerous Natives, including Cherokee and Lakota, and has disparaged sex workers and MMIW, going so far as putting an abuser as her icon of MMIM, Missing and Murdered Indigenous Men. While we have seen a significant loss of her followers and supporters, the fact that anyone she still has following her are willing to support her lies is troubling.
It hasn’t always been Sarah pushing these lies though. Color me surprised at seeing this reply recently.
Ali actually has blocked a lot of people who condemned some of her cherokee friends for anti blackness, some targeting justauneg. If you’ve ever disagreed Twila Barnes, that could be the reason. That’s the reason I believe I’m blocked.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 4, 2020
…excuse me? I had to think on this because this goes hand in hand with the same fucking lie that Sarah has been pushing for over a year and here is @madelpillar so easily spewing this bullshit as truth. I don’t remember seeing this person say this before, but it’s not to say that they haven’t. Given the fact that they’re bringing up Sarah’s feud with someone else strongly suggests to me that they’ve had this opinion for over a year and who knows how many other people have been told this from her.
Yeah. This is false 🙄 and utterly absurd. pic.twitter.com/nH7ph3jCmR— Ali Watson (@aliwatson117) July 5, 2020
The irony of this next reply of theirs is kind of… how does it feel seeing shit being said about you without receipts? Try combating that feeling for over a year knowing that people like you probably still think of a lie as truth that, because of people like you, give enough weight to a lie to pass it off as truth and perpetuate it.
Yeah honestly it is frustrating to see how much traction it’s getting w no receipts!!! Bc they know “receipts” would mean dredging up whatever awful thing I was directing my anger towards in that moment.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 6, 2020
I have yet to see a public retraction by @madelpillar about being wrong in the above first reply as well as these replies:
I can’t see the thread, so I don’t know what’s being said, but for some context: some of Ali’s white cherokee genealogist friends have taken to trying to blacklist @/justauneg from cherokee institutions on the grounds that she’s a pretendian.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 4, 2020
No no it’s fine to not want to associate with her, I don’t associate with her either. The criticisms against justauneg are VERY valid. But I’m just saying. Ali is not innocent here— and has me blocked for speaking out against racism perpetuated by her friends.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 4, 2020
No I don’t think justauneg is innocent at all. I personally don’t associate w her because of the harm that she’s perpetuated. I’m just saying why Ali has me blocked personally lol it’s just a coincidence that it also pertains to this— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 4, 2020
Every reply without directing to her “apology” are just more lies that she’s leaving as truth. The replies are still there, still public, still do not have anything connected with them to say that @madelpillar has any education about them.
The following isn’t an apology to me, by the way. She’s apologizing to someone else for being called out.
Well, irt Ali, I want to apologize for having jumped to conclusions based on bad information and prior poor influence. It was the opposite of my intent to have perpetuated any harm. But I don’t want to be painted as an enemy to SWers or indigenous women.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 6, 2020
Neither is this next bit an apology to me either. It’s even emptier than the ‘pledge’ to come back when the matter is resolved and yet they were tweeting within hours.
I don’t think posting abt ppl on the timeline with vague accusations is productive, I want to apologize to Ali for having done something similar. With that I’m going to take a break until this has been resolved. Again— I’m sorry for speaking with a lack of info & poor influence.— 1312ToNDΛ (@madelpillar) July 8, 2020
Why is this not an apology? At no point does @madelpillar own up to what she did, which was to perpetuate and spread a lie about me that I have battled for over a year thanks to her and Sarah. Whether or not she has gone back to anyone she’s said it to in order to assure that it was a lie and she was wrong for perpetuating it as long as she did. Be specific in the what and how it’s not going to continue in the future. Maybe assure everyone else that she doesn’t intend to keep lying.
It should be noted that her claim of “I don’t think posting abt ppl on the timeline with vague accusations is productive, I want to apologize to Ali for having done something similar…” is 100% false. What she tweeted in all the replies above are very specific, very character damaging baseless accusations. For which no accountability has occurred on her part.
Of course, it’d be nice to see an actual apology from Sarah as well, but I’m sure we know she’d never be that mature. Whether or not @madelpillar chooses to be is left to be seen.
The reason I have not unblocked @madelpillar is that she has demonstrated more than sufficiently to me that she’s not someone that can be trusted. Her level of apology might be sufficient for some, but this is my digital life and she’s someone who has actively worked to smear it, regardless of how long. Her intentions after the fact do not negate the impact of her actions. Being accountable to oneself is a personal choice. It shouldn’t be up to me to help them achieve that.
At this point, I don’t need to hear, ‘but she does good’ – okay sure, but she didn’t do me any ‘good’, nor has she actively worked to address or repair the damage that she helped cause. I don’t owe forgiveness to anyone who is incapable of being accountable. I won’t even give a pass to my own family for toxicity and lack of accountability. Don’t expect me to extend that to strangers.
In closing, to everyone who spoke up and educated this person. You are treasures. I have seen what you’ve done and my appreciation for you is beyond words. I wish this didn’t have to be an every couple of months thing. I don’t want it to be. If any other bullshit comes from either of these two, I’m only going to point back to this article. Anyone else who wants to perpetuate Sarah’s lies are going on this Sarah Wall of Shame.
There is also nothing keeping anyone from contacting me. There is a ‘contact us’ page on this website.
5/22/2020 update: Sarah’s new twitter handle is @sarahetbd
Native Twitter pic.twitter.com/YvetzKQhKf— TBD🔥 (@EatMyAssBitxh) May 2, 2020
Recognize anyone in this pic? Cuz I’m telling you that I see me here. What is this photo signifying? Given the whole ‘BBQ Becky’ vibe of the white woman and cell phone image that has been popularized as a meme about white women calling police on Black people, it’s not a big grasp. This is yet another iteration of photoshopping Natives and suggesting anti-blackness without proof.
But this isn’t new for this person.
The bullying and insecurity of @justauneg/@thicaroni/@justanuneg/@eatmyassbitxh (hereafter “Sarah”), is long, rather sad, and still ongoing despite numerous people pointing out how problematic she is. On the downside, …it’s ongoing. On the plus side, she seems to have gathered some of the most problematic people in Native Twitter together so going down the list of her followers to block will net you a good number of problem people.
But where did all this begin?
Last year, Sarah had beef with a Cherokee genealogist. What should have remained between the two ended up involving a whole lot of us, some of whom aren’t even Cherokee, because Sarah opted to target us and once her teeth were set, she simply did not let go. Numerous sock puppet accounts have been cropping up since last year, harassing Natives and distorting photos of people to mock them, just like the one above. When one account goes down, another inevitably takes its place. Where it once seemed obvious that perhaps there were more than one person involved in the constant smear campaigns, the root of it is still this one person, who likes and promotes content from such accounts. It’s highly likely that she is the person behind all the accounts harassing many of us.
There are numerous people that Sarah has targeted, but we’re only going to look at three people today. Myself, Mickey or EaglesElatis, and Susanna or IndigenousAI, both of the latter have agreed to be profiled for this piece. Both have Sarah blocked, yet Sarah has taken great pains to talk about both and their tweets.
For a little perspective, since the start of this year, Sarah has spoken about Susanna in particular in at least 30 tweets or replies. She has accused Susanna of endangering lives, of having to leave the area she lives in, bitches incessantly about how Susanna didn’t talk to people that she wanted her to and suggests that it’s because Susanna isn’t actually Native, but possibly a pilgrim. Somehow she doesn’t consider that maybe Susanna has a life of her own to live and that not talking to people one wants them to is a personal choice, not some conspiracy.
Let’s not forget my personal “favorite”. Sarah publicly advocated beating Susanna up and sought out her address or location from followers. This self-victimizing troll publicly sought out this information to beat up a single mother living with a minor child. This isn’t just dangerous behavior – it’s criminal.
On the other hand, Mickey has spoken numerous times before about having Creole ancestors, yet Sarah has taken that as Mickey calling herself a Black Native, which is not what happened. Her most recent tweet about Mickey was to mock Mickey for a dream that she shared. But Sarah has also publicly shared a photo of Mickey that wasn’t public on Twitter in the first place just to make fun of her. Immaturity is on brand for Sarah. Let’s not forget when she called Mickey, a survivor of domestic violence, a fake for talking about abuse and MMIW. Yet Sarah still made it about herself when you get to the end of that thread.
I’m going to pause for a moment because this one tweet says a lot about the values that Sarah holds.
A lot of CNO citizens are only Cherokee when they need help with housing, food assistance, or healthcare. Those are your real fake Cherokees. It doesn’t cost shit to be a good Cherokee. To uphold our community values.
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) March 3, 2020
A lot of Natives who know that they can, reach out to their tribes because they are citizens, can be enrolled, can be claimed for treaty benefits. I’ll highlight “TREATY BENEFITS”. I’ll do that while acknowledging the fact that many reservations were concentration camps and how those treaty “benefits” have been substandard. As many of us know, all treaties between Native nations and the United States government have been broken.
When I was 17, ma wanted to move back to the Rez. At the time, the tribe said that housing was on a 2 year wait list, but ma could put in for housing and live back home if she could find a place while waiting. In the first couple of years that my whole family moved home, they were homeless there and I was homeless in Denver. I got a place within a year after some major trauma. It took them around two years of being homeless back home before the tribe found housing for ma and my siblings. They didn’t do it to take advantage of anything. They went home to be with our people and help our community. They needed the resources and our people met them as much as possible. It didn’t cost them or our tribe anything to be decent, to source resources until a home came about.
That doesn’t make them or I – or anyone not already steeped in their culture – fake for needing those resources that were intended for our people. There isn’t a quiz to go with your enrollment. Connection and enrollment are two different things. Someday when I go home, I’ll look to our people and my tribe as resources because… we are our own resources, too. Our communities have programs and many (I want to say all because I’m pretty sure) have programs specifically for elders and disabled. No one is gatekeeping those services to only those who are one person’s “idea” of what it is to be part of that tribe or community; there’s no quiz for that either. But those aren’t public things to search and find. They are part of the fabric of our reservation and individual communities, even non-reservation communities. Things that we know and how we are with each other in our communities that define us. Access to that doesn’t extend to non-Natives or sometimes non-residents. Much the same has been evident in other reservations that I’ve lived on.
Then there is Sarah accusing MMIW, or Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, for their own demise if they’re sex workers. That a known abuser was Sarah’s representation of MMIM, Missing and Murdered Indigenous Men, in a juried art exhibit using a copyrighted photo. When the abuser attempted to doxx their victim, Sarah promoted the content. There’s more! Though really, what more do you need to know about the kind of person that she is from this. Sarah sometimes goes on about MMIW as it relates to her, yet that doesn’t apply to people that she doesn’t like. Sarah is fine disguising her violence as disbelief.
As for me, I honestly couldn’t tell you when she decided to target me but for months, she and her sock puppet accounts have been calling me anti-black and that I accuse people of being a pretendian without proof. While she and her sock puppet accounts have not shown where I have been either anti-black or falsely accusing people of being pretendian, multiple accounts have gone through great lengths to claim this; her photoshopped ‘meme’ is just another iteration of that. This prompted action on my part to refuse any connections to her, warning those who follow me that I would not have any mutuals with such a toxic and dangerous individual.
Where did it all begin? It’s hard to pinpoint a specific moment, but I am willing to bet it started somewhere around here:
The two premises in which people don’t like her, don’t add up. Being Cherokee isn’t about being on some BS colonized rolls. It isn’t blood or DNA related. Being Aniyunwiya is working with your community. Traditions. Culture. https://t.co/nSWrUwnORp
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) May 21, 2019
CW: Rape reference to next ===========================================
What is known about Sarah’s background from this thread and other tweets/replies is that she is not enrolled, but is claiming to be EBCI, Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians. Sarah has publicly stated before that both of her parents are white and that her white father signed her birth certificate despite the likelihood of not being her father because her mother had been raped. This seems to have given her a ‘my ancestors aren’t non-Native because documents can be wrong’ attitude as it’s something she’s claimed in other tweets.
People who are reconnecting, or trying to reconnect, will make many mistakes in doing so. Hell, many of us are still reconnecting despite feeling connected our whole lives. I have seen elders in my family make mistakes. Making mistakes is fine when it’s a learning experience. The problem is that someone claiming to reconnect is not only fucking shit up for themselves, but they’re doing an awesome job of trying to drag as many of us into it as possible. Perhaps Sarah is stuck in a perpetual “misery loves company” mode. I implore anyone on the fence about her to explore her tweets, replies, and most definitely her actions. This isn’t just affecting Cherokee people. Frankly, I am exhausted anytime someone tells me about her obsession with one of us with new tweets, subtweets and replies.
In researching for this piece, I have noticed some very definite patterns that Sarah engages in. If you go through her timeline, see what she is QRT, or quote re-tweeting, and how it has virtually nothing to do with the thing she’s quoting, but will skew things to an avenue that makes it about her, her expectations, her disdain – her judgement basically. For example:
The entrance to Auschwitz said “ Arbeit macht frei” or “Work sets you free” https://t.co/aMQs0o2ETt
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) April 18, 2020
I never would have thought this needed to be said, but the lockdown in effect to suppress the spread of the coronavirus is not equivalent to a concentration camp. No one is being systematically wiped out at the behest of government.
False equivalencies are par for the course when it comes to the “knowledge” that Sarah spreads. While I won’t speak about sovereignty in relation to Cherokee tribes, I will say that sovereignty isn’t wildly different between tribes. Self determination is very important. The thing is that there are two ways of looking at it and this is just as I see it from someone who’s lived on and off Rez.
Federal recognition is important. There are guidelines in place for the federal government to recognize, currently, over 500 Native tribes in the United States. Many of the names of these tribes do not correspond to how people in those tribes identify themselves. For example, on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, we are referred to as Sioux when we identify as Lakota. The name issue isn’t with us. It’s with the government, but we acknowledge it while still using Lakota among ourselves. Already this is an important distinction with regards to one of my tribes in particular.
Enrollment is mandatory to be recognized as a citizen of our nations and to access resources meant for our tribes. Many tribes utilize blood quantum to determine who may or may not be enrolled. Most tribes that I’m aware of tend to base enrollment requirements on genealogy and connection to rolls made in the past. Our tribal government does operate in a similar fashion to the federal government and it’s for the purpose of defined laws and recognition of those laws being enforced locally and federally. The two sides of that communication must be compatible.
Now. That’s as far as I go with the federal government. Among our people, we determine who is and isn’t one of us. We have our own guidelines, our own ceremonies, our own cultures. That’s just for us. The federal government doesn’t have anything to do with those ties, those connections or ceremonies and there are currently no policies in place to police our cultures. Discrimination exists to this day though, from the government, the ignorant, and the pretendians.
Sarah has gone through great lengths over the last year to demonize Cherokee Nation in particular. She has complained about Native academics while hypocritically puffing her chest about getting a degree in Cherokee studies. The constant whining over ‘a blue card doesn’t make you Cherokee’, how she’s not enrolled, that enrollment needs to be done away with – these are all the petty musings of an outsider not getting what they wanted so no one should have it.
If a cosmic manager of enrollment existed, Sarah would be talking to them right now.
Not only that, but she has a white entitlement mindset that will crow just about every day about how she’s more Cherokee than other Cherokee. She believes in language revitalization, but will complain how it’s a burden she bears to be better for the same Cherokee people that she belittles. She has colonized ideas about what it should mean to be Cherokee and it isn’t what she’s seeing from tribal governments who should be using her ideas. The ‘white savior’ complex is loud and clear.
It occurred to me that I would be linking a ton of tweets and sharing galleries of screenshots. Instead, I invite you to delve into the timeline of @thicaroni and determine for yourself. Do a search for terms like Cherokee, EBCI, enrolled, enrollment, etc. It won’t take long to see the superiority complex she has going on.
The danger that Sarah presents isn’t merely trolling. Because of her endeavors, multiple people have been targeted and harassed for months. Using a known abuser to represent an entire movement, which caused his victim to go into hiding after he publicly shared their general location. She’s threatened a single mother with physical violence and has openly supported Natives who are openly anti-black.
Back when I made a post about what I had been experiencing:
I have mutuals with this account. This looks like another iteration of a group account that photoshops photos of Natives they dislike and makes derogatory memes of them. If you share whatever hate or fetish that they have for me, you can unfollow me. pic.twitter.com/A1MoFjFgBz
— Ali Watson (@aliwatson117) February 5, 2020
The following was Sarah’s reply. Mind you, I’ve had her blocked forever. Mind also that I didn’t name her because at the time, I wasn’t sure who was behind the sock accounts, but she came forth to say something specific about my post. She’d always been the common factor before and to me, it solidified the source of the harassment.
No one is obsessed with you. You’re just an underling in all this. You follow dogs then you get fleas. You got fleas. pic.twitter.com/os9pYHwu8I
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) February 6, 2020
Though this self own of calling herself fleas still cracks me up. There are other times that I’ve spoken about this as well. I’m lucky to have a network of people looking out for me to point out such things as they come up.
The most recent obsessive action that Sarah has done about Mickey isn’t that long ago:
It bothers the hell out of me that people use the word abuse so lightly. Calling you a fake ass bitch isn’t abuse, Mickey. Being choked out, beaten and verbally manipulated is abuse.
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) April 18, 2020
From Ali to Sarah. Grow the fuck up.
If you have to talk about me to say you’re not obsessed with me, it can come off like…you’re obsessed.
Anyone can unfollow me at any point in time. It’s obsessive to block and watch me just to bitch and whine and make inflammatory declarations. This isn’t high school. Grow up.
— Ali Watson (@aliwatson117) February 6, 2020
Someday when you’re ready to actually connect with an open mind to the people that you claim, you’ll (maybe) be a positive influence. Until then, leave the rest of us alone. Maybe take your own advice.
You cant reconnect to something that was never yours. pic.twitter.com/bLepEEsMN5
— Thicaroni and Cheese 🔥 (@thicaroni) March 26, 2020
As a final warning from me, Sarah. It’s coming up on a year of your harassment and smear campaigns. The only other people as obsessed with me are pedophile gamers. If your harassment and smear campaigns continue against me, I will pursue every legal avenue available to stop you. It’s not funny or cute. Your actions are not harmless and you are not going to be without accountability should you continue. Leave. Me. Alone.
If you’re being victimized by this person, I encourage you to explore legal options as well.